Wednesday, December 9, 2009

Do you REALLY believe there's a great match for you out there?

If you don't, you might as well not even think about dating yet. In my experience coaching hundreds of singles of all ages, I've found that NOT believing is the #1 biggest obstacle standing in their way. At least 50% of the men and women I coach tell me they doubt there are any good people left out there in the dating world. They say:
"All the good ones are taken."
"Nobody seems to want a long-term relationship anymore."
"People aren't really interested in dating; they just want to socialize."
"I can't seem to find my type of person anywhere."
And I say to them: you gotta believe or you'll just keep spinning your wheels.

The truth is: a positive attitude about your chances of finding love is KEY. Without it, you'll radiate defeatist, negative vibes. And those are not at all attractive. Here's what to do instead:
Since like attracts like, you want to focus your thoughts and feelings on the belief that you CAN and WILL find someone the Law of Attraction can work and you can attract that person to you.

If in your mind and heart you've given up...or you feel hopeless...or you harbor negative feelings about the opposite sex based on the last couple of disappointing relationships you had, you're sabotaging yourself. That kind of thinking will cause you to lose confidence in yourself and the dating world and to eminate "ho-hum" and "I'm no fun to be around" vibes. And people will pick those up the minute they meet you and, most likely, turn in the other direction.

So, here's my challenge to you: next time you catch yourself feeling disgusted or despondent about the quality of the people you're meeting, think about a couple you know who are happy together. Imagine yourself in their shoes. Picture being with a partner who's compatible with you. Close your eyes and FEEL what it'd be like to be held and loved by that person. Do this the next time you have hopeless or negative feelings...and the next time...and the next time. Pretty soon, you will have shifted into a more positive, confident, happy place. And from THAT place, see what you attract. You will begin to BE WHO YOU WANT TO ATTRACT. And I bet you'll start to have a lot better experiences with dating.

Drop me a note to let me know how this works for you. It worked for me right before I met Jim, and I'm hoping it works for you too! :-)