All my life, I avoided solitude. It was easy when I was one of 5 kids in a small house...and effortless in a dorm for 3 years in college living with a bunch of other girls and in grad school living with 2 fellow students.
I had my first taste of living alone in my own apartment at age 23 and slowly began to like it. Granted, I still had a lot of people contact hanging out with 3 neighbors my age in the same building, working at a busy publishing company, and long-distance dating a man I'd met in grad school. It was a nice balance.
But, then, after my divorce at 41, I experienced loneliness for the first time. I had lots of alone time when my 2 kids were with their dad. The feeling was uncomfortable and foreign to me, so I immediately made plans to NOT be alone, by attending singles and hiking groups at least 3 times a week. But I also balanced those outings with time doing solo activities I enjoyed, such as watching rented movies, reading self-help books, walking in nature, baking, exercising every day, and talking to old friends on the phone.
And, of course, I've worked alone from home as a self-employed writer, editor, and coach for 37 years. So I'm now OK with solitude.
How about you? Are you comfortable with the isolation and solitude you've had to deal with during the pandemic? If you're single and live alone, it might be tough at times. If you want to date but have less options now, solitude is becoming a way of life you didn't choose but now must adapt to.
It can be challenging unless you use your alone time to do things that move you closer to your goal of finding love. Here are 4 ways to do that (by being someone who's better able to attract a partner):
- Read books or take classes about dating and/or personal growth--so you can resolve any issues that might have blocked love in your life
- Meditate, pray, and/or do yoga or other body or breath work--so you can get more centered and content with yourself and your world
- Spend time in nature, boosting your spirits and sense of calm and inner peace-- so you'll be a happier, kinder person
- Write in a journal to explore the lessons you've learned from all your past relationships--so you can go forward now with new wisdom about being a healthy partner
If you need support pursuing these things, I'm here for you!
gayle@datingsuccesscoaching.com or 267-245-3023
