What Do YOU Think of Free Online Dating Sites?

When I was dating online a few years ago, there were only 1 or 2 free sites available. Nowadays, there are plenty more, with new ones popping up quite often. You've probably heard of Plenty of Fish (POF)--one of the fastest-growing free sites. And you may know about OKCupid.com and Supertova.com (for Jewish people). Many of my clients have tried POF, with mixed results. Most of the women who come to me for coaching have a story to tell about POF, and many are not good.

What I'm hearing is that the quality of the men on the site isn't that great and the incidence of scamming is increasing. And I tend to wonder whether that's because "you get what you pay for." If something is free, anyone and everyone will try it out, so--by the law of averages--the site is bound to attract more than its share of less-desirable people too.

So what do you think? Is there any difference between the type of people likely to join a free site vs. the ones who are willing to pay an average of $30/month to join a site? I'd love to hear back from you if you've tried 1 or more free sites and 2 or more paid sites, so you have a good basis of comparison. What have you noticed about the selection of prospects, the rate of replies you get back, and the number of actual meetings you set up when you compare free and paid sites side by side?

And then there's the issue of married people frequenting dating sites. Do you think the free sites are more likely to have more married people on them than the paid sites because there's no chance that a spouse will just happen to see a credit card statement with a fee for an online dating site on it and catch them in the act? Again, I'd love to hear your opinion.

To be fair, I should say that I hear complaints about lesser-quality and married people as well as scammers in reference to more than just a few online dating sites out there today, not just the free ones. Unfortunately, these problems are widespread and hard to police and control.

Drop me a note. Tell me your story. Let me know what your experience has been. In general, I don't recommend free sites to my clients because most of them are seeking long-term relationships, not just casual dating. And I tend to believe that a person who pays a monthly fee to become a member of a site is more serious about finding someone for an actual phone call, date, and relationship (rather than just some e-mail flirting, texting, and/or IM'ing) than someone who pays nothing.

In my opinion, it's more tempting, convenient, and effortless for people--married or unmarried--to dabble casually in checking out photos and contacting members of the opposite sex online if they don't have to pay. And, as a result, a large percentage of these folks have no intention of going any further...or of putting forth the effort to pick up the phone or to set up and show up for a meeting.

I'm anxious to hear your thoughts...and those of your single friends. Post a comment if you're so inclined. Thanks!