In my 8+ years in the post-divorce dating world and my 6 years as a dating coach after my 2nd marriage, I've either attended or hosted hundreds of singles events. And I've noticed something undeniable: at least 70% of the attendees are women. Why is this?
Well, from surveying men about why they didn't sign up to attend the various events I hosted in the past, I found out there were 4 main reasons:
1) It was too far away from home & they didn't feel like driving
2) They didn't want to have to get dressed up
3) Their fear about being one of a minority of guys in a roomful of women deterred them
4) If there wasn't an "activity" as the focus of the event, they felt awkward just mingling with strangers
It's unfortunate that these things keep men from taking advantage of a great opportunity to meet dozens of high-quality women. But I guess I can understand some of the hesitance on the guys' part. It takes a lot of confidence and someone pretty outgoing to feel comfortable meeting strangers for the first time. And men have had to put up with rejection from women for years in the dating world, and they'd rather not set themselves up for more of it.
One type of singles event I found got a pretty good turnout from men was a potluck dinner party held at my home. It was casual and informal and easier to talk to people in a home atmosphere. They could always chat about the food item they brought or the array of edibles other people brought as they lingered around the serving table. And they could chat with me during awkward moments and ask me about a certain woman who caught their eye and even get an assist with an introduction to her if they wanted.
What do you think, guys? Is a potluck dinner type of event something you'd be more likely to attend rather than a dance, outing to a music venue, or singles outdoor or sporting event? What kinds of venues and activities do you like best? I and all the single ladies who continue to try new events in hopes there will be some guys there would LOVE to know! Drop me a note and share your thoughts. Thanks!
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Those 4 reasons pretty much sum up why I'm sometimes hesitant to go to any singles events. One of the biggest reasons I don't end up going is if I don't know a single person there. I know the point is to go and meet people, which I need to do, but it can be difficult. I've made it a goal though, to go to a singles event in Boston this month. Work keeps me pretty tied up and I need to meet some people! To answer your other question, I'd take the outdoors events before I'd do a potluck dinner, but I know a lot of guys who would prefer that. http://se-4u.com/
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