Tuesday, April 7, 2015

Laughter Is Vital in Relationships

Ever wonder why romantic comedies are one of the most-popular types of movies? I'm guessing there are 2 main reasons:
1) We enjoy watching current or potential partners doing or saying things (or getting into situations) that make them--or us--laugh
2) Laughter is a key ingredient in every successful, healthy relationship, so audience members can relate to couples who laugh together

Experts say that laughter is important to relationship success for 3 primary reasons:
1) It's a tool in the attraction, dating and relating stages of the partnership
2) It creates a positive bond of intimacy & shared experience
3) It helps couples diffuse anger & overcome conflicts & disagreements

But did you also know that laughing reduces blood pressure, relieves stress, prevents depression, releases inhibitions/sexual blocks, improves mood, increases oxygen flow to the brain, reduces physical pain & strengthens the immune system? Wow! How many more reasons do you need for putting more fun & laughter into your life & relationships?!

Which brings me to my main point: if you & your date and/or partner aren't laughing together, your chances for long-term relationship success are severely reduced. You don't have to laugh at all the same stuff, but you do have to be able to lighten up, relax & be playful when necessary...especially when too much conflict or drama threatens to push you apart or cause you to disengage from each other.

It also helps if you can make each other laugh. After all, everyone using online dating mentions "sense of humor" as one of the top traits they're seeking, right? And they're right--it is crucial. I can't tell you how many happy couples have told me they've considered divorce but stayed because the other person knew how to make them laugh. Laughter is a very powerful way to create & maintain a tight bond with someone.

In fact, research on laughter in relationships by neuroscientist Dr. Robert Provine, as reported in his book Laughter: A Scientific Investigation, showed some surprising findings:
1) Women laugh much more than men--126% more!
2) Men are more often the laugh-getters.
3) Men like women who laugh heartily in their presence.
4) The laughter of the female is the critical index of a healthy relationship.
5) Laughter in relationships declines dramatically as we age.
6) Like yawning, laughter is contagious; the laughter of others is irresistible.

So, there you have it. Lighten up & find something to laugh about. It'll improve both your health & your relationships. I'd love to hear your stories about the part humor plays in your relationships. Send me a note!




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